I honestly hate texting.

No offense to any of the people I text. It's just that I hate doing it. I hate texting. I hate texting@ !!!!!!

And yes, I’m going to come up with a way to spin it into my new quantum metaphysics of human relations. I hate it because it forces me to collapse my current thoughts into a particle and then send that particle to someone else, where it will likely collapse their own waveform of whatever expectation they had of my reply……… or, worse yet, their waveform of whatever they're doing—in their real life, right now, at this moment in time.

It’s a totally disrespectful—metaphysically disrespectful, quantumly disrespectful—way of communicating. I wish there were no expectation for me to text anyone back. I wish I could delete my number from the public record. I wish I didn't have to do any of it.

And I know that I don’t, in fact, have to do any of it, and whatever pressure I feel to respond to people is made up by my own mind. I just wish there was no pressure at all….

What would it take? To throw my phone into a lake? But then… it just invites all kinds of new problems, new things that I’d need to address. I’d become somewhat unreachable, and that’s not exactly what I want, either. It’s don't exactly want to be totally unreachable. But I also don't like texting at all, in a way that is just, likeeeeeee... in a way that just makes me want to, likeee….. I don’t even know.

fuck it. I’m going to look into that panpsychism book again.