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Thinkin bout me

Every night oh... is it that sweet? I guess so. linear time I’m hungry already. It’s not even nine in the morning yet, is it? Well. Doesn’t matter. I’m sssseeeeeking a life without the same old linear time... I mean, I’m okay with time, and I just want to represent it more faithfully than linear time allows us to do. I don’t think the linear time, with clocks, etc., is very helpful or suitable to the purpose. Anyway. I gotta get vertical here. good morning, officially.

porch

Iiiiiiiiiiiiit’s racism. There is still racism, of course. Still plenty of racism, and it’s so tied up in classism and all this other stuff like colorism and all that, it’s all so tied up in all this stuff, bro, all this stuff is so very tied together, as if inextricably liknked. And isn’t it crazy how racism is literally offensive? It’s white people on offense, not defense, dominant, en garde, attackive. American racism is the white offensive. And it puts all non-white people on defense, which is a horrible way to live. Having to live in a defensive stance all the time, nobody wants that. To be on your back foot all the time,,,,,, idk how can you ever reach that kind of beautiful self-actualization for which we all seem to be looking?

summer's over

So crazy............ how it’s literally just over. I think if I were a tree i'd be one of the ones whose leaves are already changing. Deleting social media is scary until you can fully accept all the time you get back. I want to feel the sunlight. Two birds are flying around, seemingly playing, in a very fine-tuned, survival-skills kind of way. They are forced to do such agile things in everyday life, and they even do it when they are playing. I guess the utilitarian read on play is that it prepares you for possible, real-life, dangerous situations. We can easily visualize an occasion in which the birds would need to fly around so agilely, turning on a dime to escape from some predator. Play is important, not just because it’s fun, but because a lot of our play is actually acts of physical prowess, and we need those acts to prepare our muscles for some future something that requires us to use them. I need some water.

need some water

Something came over me.... Who's to say what private moments I’ve had which have actually been somehow recorded.

living that life

Nothing about the process is forced or strained or upadana or premeditated. I feel so free. I have nothing unresolved, so i can really enjoy the breeze blowing through things, applying some torque on these potted plants, hanging from the ceiling of this porch, sending them spinning. There are forces being exerted on everything all the time, and the wind is one of those forces. Fewer attachments means more freeeedom. Don’t let your dreams be dreams. My friend's mom said something like that. And you know, they do say build it and they will come—— You’re going to keep on letting him get away with bare minimum, aren’t you? AREN'T YOU???? Metaphorically sucking his dick over this one small act of... necessity, not even kindness? It’s not even kindness, but necessity. Don’t overthink any of it the whole time, ant, and that’ll be how you have the most fun and get the most done. As if productivity is even the goal anymore.

Biphobia Wikipedia article

bullied me into submission. Bisexuals are really a powerful sect of the community of living beings on planet earth. They’re so powerful that they would bully me out of my own hot take. They would make me keep it an inside thought. inside thoughts Which I suppose is good, because I was getting too nuanced with my discourse about bisexuals. In reality, we are still in a world in which bisexuals probably do need more rights!!!! So why am I going on the record saying some shit about bisexuals? Why would I try to bring bisexuals down when I could be lifting them up?

copium

is one hell of a drug.

Mmmmm outside!

Basically what we’re gonna do is dance.... this is one of the most genius songs ever made... like holyyyyyy shit dude this dadaist masterpiece... like wait what the hell? Who was telling her how to sing these lines? Who was telling her to do this? Like really, seriously, who was doing this? Who is responsible for this? Did vanessa actually write any of this or make any of the production decisions? At the end of the day, she was the song's ultimate vocal producer, was’t she? It’s just that.... like..... it’s almost SO affected that it’s like, was this someone’s particular vision? The act of mercy, the most merciful act, would be if capitalism ended and we didn’t have to witness any more of its abject horrors. That would be the most merciful thing. Because if things are this bad now, it's only going to get much worse the longer it goes on. When something is wrong, it doesn’t get better with time. It gets worse with time. Bad things get worse; that’s something I believe. Things don’t get better when you white-knuckle them, bro. Things don’t get better after you decide to stick it out. They actually get worse. They actually get worse. Capitalism, something that wasn't right to begin with, has only gotten worse and is only going to get worse, don’t you think? Capitalism, med school, my first love, all these things are things that when you, ant, stay in them, you only feel worse. All these things, all these things, all these things, all these things only getting worse and not better.

Wasp, hornet

I have no idea the difference. But some of them are under that red table, starting a colony. Well, no, the colony has already started. Without any notice of ours. We haven’t noticed it, have we? But now, that table is compromised. Now, in my opinion, that table belongs to them. I would not want to sit there. That table belongs to the bugs; so do the chairs. The chairs also belong to the, uhhhhh...... to the bugs. Because one time, I tried using it as a standing desk, but then it.... it, uhh...... it...... didn’t work, because I felt these micro-abrasions, these little, tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny little bites, you know what i mean? These little, tiny bites... these little, little-ass bites, bro, the tiniest of bites, the smallest bites of all time, the smallest bites you could ever even imagine. ▒▒▒▒▒’s dad comes to mind, and then his mom does, and then his sister does. That right there is a classic WHITE American family. That right there is the illusion of it, the illusion of the American dream. That is what the early settlers were hoping to accomplish. And it’s honestly a little amazing that we can still see that level of apparent normalcy in the midst of all this shit. It’s giving no family history of mental illness. The hummingbirds are here. Two of them, by the porch, eating from the flowers, the same ones that the wind's torque was causing to spin. And, for the first time, i see the natural beauty of those flowers. I notice, for the first time, their natural beauty. It took the endorsement of the hummingbirds to make me see it. I’m more trusting of the natural environment than anything else at this point. The level of degeneracy in humanity is such that I can’t really trust ANY of it, anything that we come up with. You know what I mean?

kesha said

She thinks it’s time for a revolution. I don’t know why sometimes it’s said that warrior is her sophomore album. To me it’s just not true. Cannibal was enough of an artistic statement for me to take it as a legitimate second album. And maybe that’s not consistent with some other logic of mine... Not interested in that last train of thought, not really.

and in fact,

I wasn’t really interested in that last heading, either... just being honest... just being honest. But what do I know!!! What do I even know? Not much, I’m sure, not too much, not too much, not toooooo much. In my time... Another hummingbird. It’s looking for a flower and finding it in a wild cucumber plant. I think it is... or, is it finding anything? Has it found anything? It’s sure as hell humming around, and it’s gotta be using a lot of energy to keep its wings flapping so fast. That’s an amazing feat of nature. The hummingbirds, those are some of the coolest, most epic creatures we’ve got. Time to throw on some cehryl.

Unless they show interest,

I’m not going to give them too much time of day. Because think of all the people who are already showing interest and I’m neglecting! To go out of my way to find someone else who’s interested in me... what a waste of time that would be, and what an act of grasping. But this area out here, this is a very agreeable area, and I like how nature has started to conquer it, to take it back over. I’m looking at my laptop, and I see grease on the trackpad and some of the keys. You know that feeling when you acquire a new piece of technology, and it’s so clean and prisitne that you’re like, "I can't even imagine getting fingerprints on this thing, let alone grease. I don’t want that, I don’t want anything like that...." and then you let nature creep back in, and then one day you’re like, "well damn, look at the grease on my trackpad right now." Anyway, this is all of secondary or even tertiary interest to us right now. I don’t want people to feel like they have to perform wellness for me. I was just thinking of ▒▒▒▒ ▒▒▒▒▒▒ and how she’s stopped checking in on me for the time being and how when I did talk to her I felt like I had to keep up this illusion of normalcy for her, this perfect child act, you know what I mean? I had to keep up this sort of act for her, and then I think of ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ and how normal and well-adjusted he was acting in front of me. He was acting extremely normal to the point where I have to wonder if it’s an act. And I do wonder, and I do have to really remind myself... maybe some people don’t feel like they have to perform. But this is a child who is coming into the adult world of whiteness and capitalism, and it’s a world of performance, and you have to be normal, or else. There are severe, world-shaking world shaking consequences for being not-normal..... that is just the truth, and that is just the case. That is simply the case! I have this urge to use the hammer against the nail. The hammer in question is this bottle of 20-oz, value-size Spectracide wasp and hornet killer, kills on contact, twenty-seven feet jet spray. I think of the nest under the table, and I’m like, "well I might as well spray it down, right? End these fuckers' lives... take everything that they feel attached to right now and light it on metaphorical fire... spray it with whatever chemical is in this thing." On the other hand, I could examine the bottle, find out what the active ingredient is, and do my own research... at least put a word to the destruction. I know it’s not just called spectracide. the other hand

Prallethrin.

And the other ingredient is............ let me go back and put it in my short-term memory again. Lambda cyhalothrin. Those are the two active ingeredients in this thing, and together they take up less than one percent of the total solution. That shit might must be exxxtra poisonous. Something to research when the time is right... is the time right now? No, I’d rather look at the abundant life. I’d rather look at the sunlight shining through the leaves of the trees and ultimately reflecting off the ground, off the stone ground, the stone cut into squares, the cracks of which nature is reclaiming. So many various pains can come to you in this life, dude. I wonder how many other pains there are.... We’re capable of so much pain, so much pain.... And there you have it, as if on cue: an ant crawling in front of the boombox. It crawls on the wire that connects the boombox to power. It crawls in the direction of the outlet, now hops off the wire, crawls toward me, crawls on the rug. Now the ant crosses over the cord providing power to my laptop, and now it’s back off the rug, now going back toward the supplier of power to the boombox.... So many different types of personalities in the world, all of us part of one collelctive unconscious superorganism of sorts, and all of us contributing in various ways. Truly, economics are not lost on me. It’s just that I don’t find them all that interesting.... Ant carrying something now... what is it? Looks almost like it’s carrying it with the knowledge that it could get in trouble for doing so..... Did it just drop it? Yes, it dropped it, and now is walking in a circle around it. Let me investigate.

Ant head

is almost what it looked like, that sacred object that the ant was carrying and then circling. It almost looked like a decapitated ant head, but I was unable to find any eyes... and the things that I had convinced myself were mandibles at first glance started looking less like mandibles the more I looked at them.... So yeah... that’s what the ant was picking up and then putting down and then circling and then leaving alone. Much like I did, I guess. true Fuck, I’m just like ants. I am an ant. I’m an ant for real. Where did that come from, by the way? YOU ARE AN ANT, the central premise, the main thing that everyone on my website sees every time? Where did it even come from, for real? Like acutally, where did it come from? I have no idea. I honestly have no earthly idea where that phrase came from. Just one of those things, I guess. Just one of those things.... Sitcomtheory is one of the best sites on neocities, for real. Formally inspiring, and the content itself is quite inspiring as well. The form and function are tied together inextricably. They cannot be separated.... structure equals function. One of the most important lessons learned in biology that did not take on any philosophical meaning, or really any meaning other than this kind of nothingburger biologism, until I started thinking. If we have such complicated and sophisticated brains, it feels like a waste to use them in such ways, iinnnn such ways, in such ways, in such ways. I have absolutely no clue, no idea at all in the slightest, what time it is. There is no part of me that knows what time it is. I know it’s before three-ten, or maybe it’s not. I look to the clock on the microwave and see nothing but zero, and I’m grateful to not know what "time" it is right now. I know enough about it from my surroundings. I know that it’s daytime, I know that it’s daytime, I know that it’s daytime, I know the sun is up, I know the sun hasn’t gone down yet... I know the sun is in that position in the sky where you can’t see it anymore but you can still feeeel its effects, the world is still lit up quite nicely and beautifully.

Why gay?

Reading about signaling theory on Wikipedia and feeling so excluded from all the narratives that seek to explain the whole world. I’m inclined to think that the current theories and models are inadequate. I’m sure there’s some truth to the material we have right now to explain the stuff, but I think it’s also inaaaadequate. Because how do you explain gays? Does anyone even really have an interest in explaining gays? Are there any biologists who are, in good faith, trying to understand homosexuality? I’m sure there are, I’m sure there are. But they haven’t created any work to break through into Wikipedia yet, as far as I can tell... as far as I know, there’s nothing written yet on the subject that has really satisfyingly and truthfully explained why gays exist. coming out I just feel so excluded when I read about how the best way to signal that you’re phenotypically competent and ready to breed is by hunting. First of all, what happens to those of us who apparently have no genetic need to signal anything? I have no interest in signaling genetic fitness to anyone for the purpose of mating, but I think I do have that leftover remaining impulse to signal suitability and fitness. I think it’s part of the reason why I get so distraught when I look in the mirror and see that my hair is thinning in the front middle. It’s like..... if I stop being viable... But then it does make me wonder like what is the purpose of that? What is the purpose of having genetic fitness at all? Is there any purpose? Perhaps it’s to like.... I think when you’re an ideas guy, your ideas take on more respectability, unfortunately, when you seem fit. There’s some kind of disability justice angle to be discovered and applied, in that order. But I don't know what it is. I’m not disabled currently as far as I know... but I am gay.... Anyway. Huh. The writing is boring to me today.

This grassssshopppper

I’m now friends with a grasshopper. He spent one to two seconds perched on my sweatpants, on the right side, on the upper thigh area ..... he had hopped on them. He first hopped up on the wall but fell back down, then tried again hopping, and the wall deflected him closer to me, and I think that him being so close to me and seeing that I was unfazed by it, unflapped and seemingly uninterested in being a predator to him, made us friends. I think that's the way I desomnstrate god’s mercy to the bug world: by being around them and showing no interest in killing them, despite how easily I could do it. And I think if the only thing you contribute to the world on a given day is mercy, then you’ve still had a good day.

Everything is signaling theory

Bro. everything is signaling. we're all spending all day signaling all the time all day forever and ever tilllll the day I freaking DIE bro we’re signaling day in day out without much interruption

but

At the same time. But at the same time. But at the same time........ but at the same time. But at the same time. But at the same time. But at thee same time. But at the same time. But a thtttte same time. But at the same time. But at the same time. But at the same time...... but at the same time. But at the same time. But at the same time. But at the same time. But at the same time but at the same time but at the same time but at the same time but at the same time but tat the same time but at the s ame time but at the same time but at the same time but at the same time but at the saeme time but at the same time but at the same time but at the same time, but at the same time, but at the same time, but at the same time, but at the same time, That feeling you get. But at the same time, A hooooook. But at the same time or is it a net? but at the same time. Or is it a net. But at the same time, but at the same time, but at the same time. All the portals are holes In the net All the portals are holes in a net all the portals are holes in a net. Are you going in or out? It’s always in. they’re all unique nets. Individual nets. All of which must be avoided if possible. Avoid those nets that look like portals. Look instead at what’s happening here and now right now around you. The occasional rain. It’s normal to have it rain a bit during a day..... a bit of rain.

Bit of rain

holy shit, turkeys. The point of ART IS TO MAKE YOU LOOK OUTSIDE GODDAMMIT!!!!! Now I’m out here looking at the turkeys in the rain. They’re in the big field. There are six of them. They seem to be moving toward the woods. I hope I did not disrupt them.... oh my god, dude, that’s probably the coolest thing I’ve seen in my life, and it's happening right now. It’s raining and there’s fucking TURKEYS. One of them is close to the mushroom I discovered today. It really just popped up........... I don’t remember it existing before today. Unlessss I had not seen it, unless I had not seeeeen it, unless I had not seen it... but I think that’s mushroom thing, how they just spring up. unless Turkey now moving toward, now away from mushroom.... they retreat to the cover of the woods. Thank god, bro, for the world continuing to remind me of its brilliance and its singularity all the time every day. Today started with an act of mercy from god, and that was waking up in spite of it all, waking up in spite of it all, waking up in spite of it all, once more——to do what, exactly? What if it’s nothing in particular? Can you still love yourself? Can god still love you? For god’s part, the answer today was yes...... and then showing the turkeys, and the rain, the turkeys in the rain.... and wasn’t there that old wives' tale that if a turkekey looks up in the rain,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, I look up, but I am covered by a roooof. Story of my life, isn’t it? I wonder how things would change if I went into the outside world, properly, officially, fullllly.... what do you think would happen? God is showing me the ultimate act of mercy right now, in real time, every day, as I live and breathe, and as I speak, bro..... as I speak, think, hhhhhear, and live, and breathe, smell, taste, touch, and digitallly communicate.

The whole thing,

All nine of the yards, the entirety of it. All of it. The brunt of it. The whole damn thing, all of it, the entirety, the entire thing. The volume of it. The absolute volume, the container, how it’s contained, the whole thing. Didn’t even listen to bit of rain...... instead, saw the bit of rain, and saw the colony of turkeys. A mini-colony it was, but a colony nonethelessss. Immediately brought to mind is the colony of wasps slash hornets under the table. I wonder what they’re doing now. I hear they’re less active at sundown. So it says on the prallethrin/lambda cyhalothrin bottle. Theeeeeeee best learning comes from the darndest of places. Not the internet today, but the natural world, and also the, uhhhh......... bottle of Spectracide. What a terrible name. It lends it this mystical, beautiful quality that is just not deserved. It is not deserving of such a beautiful, wonderful, and mystical title as Spectracide. The -cide at the end should speak for itself. Let’s not make it fun or glamorous. Let’s not take the violence out of it, shall we? We don’t need to soften the violence of it, do we? Can we leave the violence so people can understand what it is, what horrific act they are actually attempting? And I honestly don’t give a fuck about the fearmongering that’s like ONE OF THEM STUNG MY DAUGHTER well teach your daughter how to coexist with her gotdamn environment bruh like if they’re bothering you that much maybe you should die lol. The whole idea of wills and testaments and other shit like that is so bizarre to me. I think it's a good idea to make sure you’re always in a position where you could accept your imminent death, you know what I mean? Things gotta be gooood, things gotta be good, ya gotta let things be good, my dude. Let the things be good if they’re good, and if they’re bad, well, get out of it before you die inside of it, I think, is what I would say. That’s the advice I would give to someone. I would start by asking, "hey, so if you were to die right now...." Look, there’s the moon. It's as if it's staring me right in the face. It was somewhere else in the sky not so long ago. It really is moving around in a somewhat unpredictable way, although it’s predictable in that it’s been in that same sorta general area of the sky for some time now. I have no way of determining which way is west. That's not true. West is that way.......... so then the moon is sorta sssouth but also sorta uhhhhmm...... but also sorta....... sorta east, it’s sorta southeast but more south is probably how I'd characterize it, that’s how I’d characterize it................ or maybe it’s honestly more like....................................... yeah it’s southeast for sure lol right?????? Yeah I think so............. no, it might be southwest, actually... lol I can never decide which way is west and which is east, but no, it’s closer to where the shadows are being cast over THOSE treees, so the shadows are cast in the easterly direction, cuz sun comes from the west, so then that’s east,,,, and thennnn to the right of south is.......................................... west?????? Holy fuck lol. Like..... no. cuz like.......... THAT WAY, is south.... the RIVER is to the south, and then ..... IT'S SOUTHEAST. My god just let yourself be right sometimes, dude.... To see someone die quickly is probably, in some ways, more merciful than watching them keep on dying over and over in front of you forever. I have no idea what acts of mercy will befall me, what acts of suffering, what acts of all this stuff. Would I find a solid ground? Yes, because I am firmly planted on it right now. More time on earth is its own act of mercy. It is merciful for all parties, for all who know you, because it means an opportunity. Another chance. Give me another chance. Another chance. Another chance. Another chance. Another chance. Another chance. Another chance. Another chance. Another chance. Another chance........... another chance.... And the transcendence of the mercy is such that you getting another chance no matter what happens. No matter which outcome——whether the cat is alive or dead––there is mercy in being able to have the chance. To have a chance. To do SOMETHING, to do something.... the chance to do SOMETHING, something, something, the chance to do something. The chance to literally do SOMETHING....... the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something... th e chance to do something... the chance to do something.... the chance to do something... the chance to do something... the chance dto do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, tehehe chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, the chance to do something, no matter what. Youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu have it right now, ant. You have it right now, for real for real, genuinely and honestly, you have it right now..... running on empty, but it’s actually full, many times over,,,,,, I wonder if underneath all the worrying is a secret hope that something WILL go horribly wrong. And the barriers and dynamics and curses and spells that I am up against, they are not lost on me, not at all. But I do surrender to the natural world, and I sit on the porch. I sit on the porch and I surrender to the natural world and I sit on the porch. I sit on the porch, and I see the mushroom in the distance, clear as day. Remarkable. It was remarkable up close as well. You know me, asperging——I mean aspiring——naturalist. I gotta lay eyes on things. "Actually touch the patient." The universe still got me no matter what. The mercy will be here no matter what, in spite of anything that happens or fails to happen, anything at all, anything , anything, anything. Anything that happens can be handled. Anything that haaaaaaaappens will happpppen. Things will stretch, other things will calcify, other things will shatter, all things will die. People will die, ants will die. Wasps and hornets will die, both of them, as well as schrodinger's wasp/hornet-cats under the table.... All of us will die. Audrey Hobert will die. I’m going to die. The deaths of others that I will witness in the meantime will help me prepare for my own, and isn’t that the ultimate point? Is death not one of what we might call the ultimate points? maybe And the sun would fall and rise as it does. The sun would fall and rise as it does. The sun would fall and rise as it does. The sun would fall and rise as it does. The sun would fall and rise as it does. The sun would fall and rise. The smells of the flowers would be the smell of the flowers. The birds would fly around, in large numbers, as they are right now, seemingly playing, or perhaps scouting something out, but if they were just scouting, there would be no reason for these flips and tricks, and the seemingly circular nature of the flying. There would be none of that, I shouldn’t think. There is play everywhere, and everything is signaling theory. Okay, but it is getting a little late, though, isn’t it? I’ll check on things. The phone, the time, see what’s up, if anything..... or is that..... that rumbling...... is that the car? That rumbling..... I hear it, the bass, I hear it, coming from the right direction.... but then gone...... then gone.... then back, or is it? I don’t think so. I don’t feel it. I don't hear it...... I hear something, wait, I do hear something...... I do hear something, but it seems to be some great swelling of some great natural force not built by man. So then...... so then.... what do we call that? It does sound actually sort of somewhat artificial.... doesn’t it? Just not a car.... then what? Some kind of aircraft, but the sound is dampened by the clouds? Or is it really some great natural swelling, as of wind or thunder or the like? That would be my best guess now.......... or is that it, is that, within the swelling, is that the bass of an approaching vehicle.... is the great swelling something communicating? Is it some great communication? Could it really be some great communication? No suchhhhhh..... no such. I’ll go check the screen and see if it has any insight.

That’s suspicious.....

That’s weird...... seven thirty eight and still no sign, no sign at all, all the possible signs just being red herrings, right? It’s all been red herrings so far.... hmmm....

Finally, Predreams.

I would quite like to bask in this glow a little longer The laptop glow, not the tv glow I’m not trans you guys I don’t need my egg to get cracked the egg is intact we’re not trans we don’t need to do that It’s so arbitrary all these ways we could label and section off our lives Came back when it mattered I saw you... taylor entering her mega flop era Luckily she can still work a crowd of sycophants mind you still can make em laugh and say stuff that’s true and funny and genuine like luckily she’s still got that, but she has this deseperation to her that is just really hard to stomach as a longtime fan of hers, likeeeeeeeeeeeeee this woman is damn near forty years old just like... being annoying and making medleys of her shitty asssss new song with her old classics like let’s stoppppp please let’s stop this taylor we neeed and want and deserve better from you girlfriend. The lesson being, and this is a nonsequitur according to you (reader) but not to me (experiencer), if it’s not comfortable or easy then you’re not going to do it. I don’t wanna write. I’d rather sleep. And it's all because my arms are cold, and I think about covering them, and that sounds so much better than writing. So if it’s hard, we’re not really gonna do it, bros, and this is the real cornerstone behind why I’ve beeeeeeeeen able to maintain this productive streak all along, dude, this is why this is why this is why that is why I don’t want to seek out holes to fill I want to make what I make and see where it slots in after the fact It’s not about doing things when you’re aksed or told to do them it’s about doing them when you want to do them, and then maybe someday someoene will ask you for it, that particular thing that you made oh so long ago and now bear in some ways much less identification with And that’s the mercy is that if you keep going there’s always a new something to give you hope that you can expresssss what you want to express And you lose some connection with the older stuffff as it gets older But for my part, I don’t know I’m getting tired of saying I don’t know. What if I do know? What if i actually do know, and I’m gn but anyonennn The glow is now over. We had been basking in it all that time, can you believe it? And now it’s out I can turn the brightness down on my screen from this detachedddd keyboard, . I likvigg a ogood one. I’ll goddwjjjjj a lot of key points about if he wanted to he would type of stufffffff And she’sg to on a big nice feather boa, but then okkk ive reda isiiiiiiiiiiiiiifdscgx c leanreeeeeed alotfrothisbuys ember, aiglgkf mugggggggg everyihigng evrygin likdvaeedeaths the mount fimto She is out the lving oom or athrethe odtrdck,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,kk,,,