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writing first time writing today yyyyyyyyy because i have a what??? life. i have a life and it was proven quite thoroughly today. accepted my first assignment at ████ ██████ breh i'm ready to get to work apparently cuz i volunteered myself for tomoooorrow like uu know what no time to waste we gotta gogoo ahead and getet started here like we're about to serve now is the time if not now then when and if noooooot we then whoooooo kind of thing and i'm getting paid 25 dollars an hour which will be more than enough to get me by on all the gas groceries etc i neeed. we will soon have a sustainable form of cash income so like if we want to start participating in the economy we can do it with the satsifaction that it is money that i earned from the state of ███████ i'm basically working for the government here like this is a government-funded ██████ when you think aobut it so like okay babe i'll lick the boot checks alarm once more just to be safe.... and it's on and we're safe and i feel confident in this technology i feel confident that iiiiit will work there's no way i don't have some haters bro there's just no way right? i feel like i gotta have some. over the years you accumulate some people who don't fuck with you just likeee you accumulate ones that you don't fuck with@@@@ it's all part of the same beautiful soicial circle of lliiiiife. friendships die relationships fall apart it all happens in this big long beautiful life that you choose to live among people among people is a fine way to be, mind you, dude, a fine, fine way to be iiiiis among people... nothing wrong with that, nooooot in the slightest, ain't noooothing wrogng certain reassurances you can make it's quite beautifullll it's really quite beautifullll to be alive and among friends like █████ is here and it feels so diiiifferent and liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike good to have him here and to have queened out like that was awesome i can take a break from nolifing my website real quick lol anyway yeah ffff thinking about that image dali sent of the ant shooting itself in the head while also cumming and i lowkey think that iiiiis literally hoooow ants breed hooow male ants breed is liiiiiiiiiiiiiikkke if my own anthill is correct then it's true that ummm then it's true that male ants just like fuckin die after theyyyy have passed on their genes they are like okay we did that time to go on a bender and live fast die young bad ants do it well like i was saying to █████ sometimes it's better for your dad to have died a legend than for your dad to be alive. thinking about kids out there with abusive asshole horrible fathers who are literally better off dead we don't know anything we only picture the visuals which come to mind, like the broccoooooli as the tree of life with an all-seeeing eye held by aaaaa master hand behind theeeee window created by the florets of the brocccoli as they shoot up from the trunk.. you can seee through the holes if you look closely... SCALE, something can look so large and then as you get closer you see that it is actually fractcals and this is why i want a microscope. because i simply want to be able to See Shit. you know? that is allllll i want is to be able to see shit. pumpkaboo lurks in the background no matter what. lampent too. and there is spooky season llleaking in through my subconscious. luckily now i have a partner in crime with whom we can do spooky shit and all i really neeed is toooo chat and also to read and write and like i'll go to my cheeeky new job tomoooorrow and that'll be a thing too but it certainly feeels loooower stakes than medicine like thank god this might be the thing. it'll also be the most i've ever gotten ppppppaid lol except dogsitting this will be the highest i've ever... except was there a summmer that iiiiii got paid six thousand dollars for doing aboslutely nothing? for WORKING FROM HOME bruh and even when i went into the ooooffice it was mainly a cheeeky thing toooooooooo do and an excuse to work on writing like i was just writing breh and doing random shit... not working, never working, hardly ever working... i knew how to doooo the job and it was simply so fucking boring to me that i just like couldn't bring myself to do it really at all... the crazy thing is how quietly many of these jobs will have disappeared like █████ didn't even have the opportunity to do the job i did. she will have to actually legitimately get into med school she gonna have to work for it and shit like there are frauds among us in med shcool ppl who got in based on some trickery some clownery just on like good academics alone mostly cuz i really like finessed every single one of my hours bruh like... i did the bare bare bare and absolute minimum required to get an md i picture rosalina in a gothitelle esque dresss............ real onnnnnnes will know

real ones will always know

and tonight the real ones were ████ and █████ liiiikeee that shiiiiiit is so coool like honestly shoutout to those motherfuckers who i was like hey maybe they won't.... but you know that calm before theeee real resolution of both of them... the point when i felt like the only person on the planet... that was so fucking fu....n... such a specific ass feeling and i loved it so muhhhchhchh dude like that specific ass feeeling UGH like inject it into my veins i love being alone and i love being with other people and i love ████ and i love █████ and like shit mannn..... i just love them both fake gay i'm of the belief with straight boys that they're straight until PROVEN gay at this point like i don't hold any hopes until they literally prove it for themselves. i learned that lessson so many times by now that it feels good to be able toooo actually really truly know it and feeel the knowledge actually influencing the behaviors.. that feels like growth. so like i'mmm wanting to end it on that good positive beautiful note of growth. i don't quite feel tired enough to fall asleep but sometimes you gotta close a door to open a window. next day