卌卌

Is this the part

when i realize that what i’m doing is not revolutionary enough? When I realize that I’m just playing into their hands by continuing to operate within their frameworks? I don’t think this is what i’m supposed to be doing. I don’t like their frameworks. I’m supposed to be getting out of their frameworks... but no, this is a good way to do it. This is about as good a way to do it as anything. I think this thought occurred to me at exactly the right time. This is the kind of trip that could lead to some radicalization. And i think that might be exactly what I need. So let’s, right away, switch our agenda. Let’s switch it real quick. Or at least recalibrate it. The trouble with the anti-framework framework is that you apply it to everything around you, and it sort of sucks the joy out of all of the capitlaistic weirdness that you used to take pleasure in. Listening to the micro-bickering of the people around me makes me think about the samsaric blade of everyday existence that is only amplified by capitalism. Living under this stage of capitalism is totally exemplary of samsara in every possible sense, but the fact that people were talking about samsara thousands of years before "capitalism was a thing" tells me that this isn’t the only way. We are going to be suffering the whole time, of course we are, but we could also be suffering in fewer ways, in ways that are less psychosis-inducing. We want people to be able to make sense of what’s happening in their lives, or else what will it all have been for? Isn’t awareness one of the greatest ways in which we can repay the gift of life? If it can ever be repaid or needs to be repaid or asks to be repaid or has the capacity to even desire to be repaid....... This has been a little bit of a tangent from the main point, which was really that I need to start taking the revolution more seriously. The fact that the government hasn’t sent me a threatening email yet is because I haven’t really done shit that would cause alarm. In that sense, I’m sort of a pussy. By the standards of real revolution. coward tomorrow